WEEKLY CHAT (non-osprey) SUNDAY JULY 7 2024

Hallo all.  Happy New Week.

  • I'm thinking of you today, LINDY - and hoping that what ails your OH will turn out to be something easily treatable. Fingers crossed ....

    And OG - you will be happier now that J has a diagnosis. Enjoy your day out, today.

    RUSTY - I was so pleased that you had good news from the hospital. Did your strawberries taste as good as they looked? My daughter in Elgin is very disappointed with hers, this year. Her greenhouse tomatoes and cucumbers are also suffering from lack of sun.

    AQ - you are always in my thoughts. Dementia of any kind brings heartache - my mum used to shout out ' Take me home' - when she was at home. My eldest son in law's mother keeps asking if her parents are coming to see her :-(  It is a horrible disease - more hugs winging their way to you - you will find strength you didn't know you had x

    Life here is just the same as ever ! I had a busy day yesterday, had visits from the podiatrist and the gas engineer. Not sure which visit made me happier, probably the gas man since he gave my boiler and two gas fires a clean bill of health. My feet just needed some TLC - I have curvy toenails on both large toes - an inherited trait, apparently !

    I'm still sleeping downstairs in what used to be my sitting room. Makes a change !   

  • Lovely to hear from you HEATHER.  A nurse friend told me that they call it the relatives illness.....although I thought I was prepared i was completely heartbroken when my Mum had no idea of my name and didn't realise I was her daughter.

  • DIBNLIB - When I was a silly and naive 18 year old student nurse I used to think that it would be better if I got dementia  rather than other diseases because I wouldn't really know that I had it . I gave no thought to the fact that I might have children or a husband who would be very distressed. I  soon learnt the reality of the situation  when I was sent to work in  an elderly care ward.... 

  • What was that about good intentions?  I had a lazy day Tuesday - OH had to do local shopping in the morning, and then attend a meeting in the afternoon, so he was never around with spare time to move me into the study!  J's improvement continues, but he is still insisting on taking paracetemol - we are still looking sfter the meds for him since the night when he got up and took breakfast ones at 2:00am!

    We all went to buy meat etc across the Solway today (have I mentioned ever that our town butcher got burned down last winter? Fire in the flat above)  We also had lunch out - except that J ate a huge all-day breakfast.

    Was hoping for good news from LINDA this evening - keeping up the thoughts and prayers.

  • HEATHER & DIBNLIB – I appreciate your comments. Some random ones of my own – I wonder how much dementia patients are aware of their problem; I know OH has been distressed when, after the first few words, he could not remember what he wanted to say. At the moment I think I would prefer he did not know me as he expects me to get him “out of here”. I blame the Doc, saying he has to approve!

    OH won’t be coming home as he needs high care. Until I stopped I did not realize how gradually his care needs had increased. He will stay in hospital until a place is available in a nursing home. ie we wait for some poor soul to die. OH is now one of the statistics causing ambulance ramping in our hospital system. Not the fault of ambos; but there are not enough beds, not enough staff or Docs, not enough money. But plenty of cash for sport. BTW I notice a certain leader in the news. His shuffling & speech sounds like my OH.

    Hoping for positive news from LINDA.

  • AQ:  I'm more than a little horrified by our options (so far!) for the election  I've noticed the stiffness in his limbs when he moves  and that look in his eyes as if he's watching but not participating - sort of on the sidelines of events in which he's the main attraction!   I'm sure your OH's slow deterioration was easily missed on a day-to-day basis; it takes something dramatic - like him wandering off - to bring it home.  Will he have his own room in a nursing home - will it be more like a 'memory care' facility?  Life is so unkind at times...    When my mother's doc started talking to me about getting my Mom somewhere, she told me "Blame me!"  My Mom was getting to the point of putting on the kettle and never noticing it was boiling dry or having the washing machine go off balance and setting off the sensor and not knowing - or even noticing.  We didn't have any family (my daughter was living in Northern California with a new baby) to help out and I hadn't married my current OH at that point.  Still I felt so guilty!  Arghh.  Still wish I'd had more options at that time.   On a brighter note, I swear Ms. D has grown another inch even when I see her every day!   She's been in Wisconsin for almost a month and I'm sure she'll be towering over me when she comes home next week.

    dibnlib:  Things never got that bad with my mom, but she did claim my sister and her husband (3,000 miles away!) had been in to visit one morning. 

    OG:  My mom (it's an evening for mom!) used to say that the "road to hell is paved with good intentions" but doesn't sound like you suffered such a result. :-)   I didn't remember that your butcher burned down - will he reopen do you think?

    Diane:  Saw images of uprooted trees in Indiana on the news - a remnant of Beryl.  How are those in your neck of the woods?

    Also hoping we'll hear from Lindybird; will join OG in holding best thoughts.

  • Good morning all from a cloudy Suffolk - with rain! expected this afternoon.

    I am just back from another trip - to Surrey to stay with friends and a day and night of Nanny duty in SE London.

    I have read all the posts and can see a lot of concern and worries about loved ones.

    AQ - my Sister is going through similar but her husband is still at home so the strain on her is huge. She is 80 and has just one son and Grandchildren nearby but hates to ask for help.

    Heather pleased that you are feeling much better.

    Annette and Lindy -  I know what you mean about growing kids. My Grandaughter Seraphina - will be 13 in October and is already 4 inches taller than me!

    Hope you all have a good weekend and take care.

  • We're very tired here but I can see that you're wondering how things have gone with my OH. We had an extremely long and tense day. I dropped him off as requested & went home to wait. And wait. He finally contacted me after lunch to say "still waiting for my turn" - he told me later that there were ten of them in the waiting area, and he was the unlucky one who went in last-- at 5.30pm.

    They said afterwards that he had some small burst veins in his bladder, and two very small lumps which they took biopsies from.

    He rang me to fetch him home but when I arrived he was not waiting, so after driving around aimlessly, I had to park in a nearby supermarket. Then we made contact again. By then it was getting dark- on our way home it began to rain. As I can't see in the dark and even worse in the rain, I was terrified-  I don't think I've been quite so frightened for a long time. We got home at 10.00pm. Both exhausted.

    He got up about 10 times in the night as they made him drink litres of water to flush himself out. Still tired today and had to sally forth to get some pads for him to wear temporarily. 

  • So sorry to read about your dreadful day, Lindy. Things could not have been much worse. What a way to organise (or disorganise) an appointment. The only good thing is that your OH has been seen by the medics at last. Great sympathies from here. You must be shattered. Wishing for a good outcome from the biopsies. Thinking of you.

    Thank you for letting us know. I think we were all waiting for news.

  • Indeed, Rosy, we were all waiting to hear.  Sorry you both had such an awful day, Lindy.  I do hope your OH gets the results of the biopsies soon.  Nothing more difficult than waiting for results.  I do hope you are able to have a few quiet and peaceful days.  Dark and rain do not make for a comfortable drive home ... glad to hear you were OK, and hope the fear has subsided now.  Before I had the last 'zap' to my eyes I couldn't see to drive at night - now I can, but I can't say I enjoy it.  I avoid it as much as I can.