I'm gutted. Wagon wheels don't have jam in them anymore. What's occurin'!?

In the good ol' days that fake Wheely jam sat tenderly against its pure white mallow like a jumped up jammie dodger.

But then in the good ol' days corncrakes croaked from the fields, corn buntings jangled from ripening corn and hedgerows were bursting with wild flowers.

Hmmmm, if there's a choice, you can keep the jammy Wagon Wheels. I think I'll go for the birds.